Written Goals

Here we are at the end of January. Twenty-eight days of the new year complete. How are Meme that says There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.those New Year’s resolutions (#newyearsresolution) holding up for you? By now, many have given up. As I’ve shared with you, I’m a little behind on things and had to give myself permission to take the month to catch up. So far, so good.

The goals from last year have been reviewed, renewed or rewritten. There were several from that last year that did not get accomplished. While considering the reason, I realized that those were the goals that required someone or something outside of me or my control to accomplish.

For example, if the goal was to get a book traditionally published, well, that requires a publisher to accept it etc. But if the goal is to get my book completed, edited and sent to a publisher, then I am the only one who controls the success of that goal.

Another consideration was that some of the goals were really more like behaviors. A goal (#goals) might be to lose 10 pounds. A behavior change is to do something like eat healthy meals. Perhaps a behavior change will support accomplishing a goal. It’s too easy to write down a bunch of goals that will later overwhelm you. This year write three or four real goals to accomplish, but then commit to one or two behaviors you would like to change.

What will 2018 hold for you?

KK

 

 

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It’s been a while —

It has been a while, it’s been a mixed-up couple of months. Just this week I’ve started to feel like I’m coming out of the surreal and back into whatever my new reality will look like. Between KK's CandorDecember 12 and 22, I lost two very special people. One a good friend, the other my mother-in-law. One was expected, the other eminent, but not expected so soon. These on the heels of encouraging a co-worker through the death of three family members and oh, did I mention having my appendix removed?

What felt so unreal was that I had spoken to my friend just a couple of weeks before and I had spoken to my mother-in-law earlier that day. They were here and now they aren’t. Life is precious.

A few days after my mother-in-law passed away I listened to a voicemail she had left me earlier in the month. I just wanted to hear her voice before saying a final farewell. Some might find that morbid, but we all mourn differently. Then I deleted both from my contact list. But neither has gotten very far from my thoughts.

Needless to say given the timing of both of these deaths, our holidays were less than relaxing. And starting the new year, well there has been a trail of things to clean-up and finalize. It has taken me 19 days into 2018 to begin to feel like I’m getting order back to my home, and back to living somewhat of a routine-driven life.

For the last several weeks, I’ve taken care of my family and I’ve worked. Two things that are a priority. But I haven’t had much brain-space for the other things I want to do — read, write and stay true to my new year’s habits consider goals for the year. Don’t worry, we will get there. If you’ve followed KK’s Candor for long, you know that I am all for setting goals and creating order. Rest assured both are coming soon.

We still have some challenges to work through. But doesn’t everyone. We will get there with faith, love, and dedication.

Thank you for sticking with me. I look forward to moving forward in the year sharing with you the anecdotes of my life.

All the best,

KK

#grief

Hospital Time Warp

There have been two occasions recently that I found myself in the hospital, visiting not doctor visitbeing cared for. As when anyone goes to the sit with a friend or family member it was impossible to plan for how much time is needed. What I learned about the way time works within the walls of a hospital is that the clock measurements are secondary to the events that take place.

Time is measured from having a test run to when the results come back from it. The next measurement is what will happen from those results. A CAT scan is ordered. Wait. Go have CAT scan run. Wait. Receive the results. All clear, good, breathe, next steps. Wait. The doctor will be in with the official diagnosis. Wait. Meds are offered every four or six hours. Shift change. New nurses, another round of vitals. Dinner comes at 5:00 p.m. Food services do seem to use a regular clock. Perhaps food service workers are the links to living on real-world time.

As a visitor, it’s an odd feeling to walk out of the hospital time warp and back into normal timekeeping to realize 10 hours have passed. If I had started knowing I would be there for a long period, would I have planned differently? Taken snacks? To be honest, sitting in the hospital with a family member, time really doesn’t matter, only they do and making sure they are being cared for. The time warp of hospitals is necessary to keep the health of the patient the priority. Here’s hoping for less time spent in the hospital and especially in a hospital bed.

All the best,

KK

Leggings are NOT Pants

leggings not pantsWell ladies (young and old) this Maxine cartoon pretty much says it all. Leggings are NOT pants, nor were they EVER intended to be. I’ve been watching this phenomenon for months. Every time I see one of these fashion emergencies I just shake my head in disappointment. My judgement isn’t limited to those with robust bums or the aged, it is cast on the young and skinny as well.

I’m no couture expert, but I do know a couple of rules about what not to wear and how to wear clothing that looks good. Your outfit should complement your shape. It’s the difference between someone saying “I really like that outfit” and someone saying “That outfit looks great on you.” You make the outfit. If you are one to wear your leggings as pants, next time you don a pair, look in the mirror. Do they really flatter your figure or just give it smooth lines?

Leggings look cute with a skirt or dress. I sometimes wear them under my workout shorts in the winter. The styles with color or designs can really add some flare to your outfit. But they absolutely do not look good by themselves as a means of covering your lower extremities. The fashion industry confused some when they added pockets and tried to call them jeggings. Let me help you out — they are NOT pants.

Would love to hear from you on this one.

KK

 

Content or Complacent?

This morning our lesson in Sunday school (or for the modern church they are called Weekend Groups) we discussed a passage in Philippians about being content.

10 I rejoiced greatly in the Lord that at last you renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you were concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. 11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength. — Philippians 4:10-13New International Version (NIV)

While the passage focuses on being content no matter what our human situation is, the lesson made me think of two things. First what is the difference between being content and being complacent?

lazy manBoth definitions include the phrase “being satisfied”.  The difference is that the definition of content indicates not needing more and complacent includes not wanting more. I agree with the author here that when we fully rely on God, we can be content in all earthly situations that come our way. But what I wonder is if we get complacent, do we stop seeking Him? Do we stop stretching ourselves in order to grow in our faith?

The other thought I had was about the things God doesn’t want us to be content with. This list would include the eternal. I don’t think he wants us to be content with where we are today in our faith. We should always strive to grow more in our faith. I don’t think He wants us to be content with our current knowledge of His word. The Bible says to meditate on it day and night. I don’t think He wants us to be content with how strong our witness to others is today. Every person we encounter needs to see Jesus in us.

His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.

For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. – 2 Peter 1:3 – 8

Can we do all of this perfectly? Never. But at the end of the day, when we fail in our human efforts we take comfort in the fact that His mercies are new each day and the words of Paul in second Corinthians 12.

But he [the Lord] said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. — 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 New International Version

Be encouraged.

KK

There is a Difference

Recently I heard someone say there is a difference between being filled and being fulfilled. This was a statement I had to write down and think about.  Later that day I treated myself to some McDonald’s French fries. I don’t do this often, but I took my son to get his lunch and the waft of deep fried potatoes made only the way McDonald’s makes them, overtook my judgment as soon as I opened the door.

cokeThey came out piping hot; a golden delight to behold.  My fountain Coke bubbling wonderfully over ice with the straw at the ready. I chose the perfectly shaped fry and took that long awaited bite.  As I chewed up this fantasy favorite, I quickly noted that there was no salt on them. My craving and thoughts of sinking my teeth into the perfectly deep fried, lightly salted McDonald’s fries were shattered by the reality of what I was served.  It was if karma (if you believe in karma) swooped in with my doctor’s orders to watch my salt. I left the restaurant filled with carbs and completely unfulfilled otherwise.books1

In that moment I was seeking fulfillment from something very temporary.  Even if the salt had been correct, I would have still been hungry an hour later. Had I chosen more wisely, perhaps a something in the protein family, or even chosen an entirely different restaurant, my fulfillment would have been of higher quality and would have lasted longer.

In a similar fashion, each day we choose what we fill our minds, hearts and souls and body with. Are we choosing high quality information?  Are we looking for positive stories and information that grows us personally and professionally? Are we using our own judgment to determine what to believe and dwell on or are we just believing everything others tell us? Do we fill our minds with the junk food offered on television or in the media? Are we choosing that which is temporary or that which transcends earthly misperceptions of lasting peace and satisfaction?

TV setBy filling our hearts and minds with that which leads us to grow, learn and even change for the better, each day we become more of who we are meant to be. We will find ourselves more in tuned with that which produces longer lasting fulfillment.

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. Philippians 4:8-9

Share with me your thoughts on the matter.

All the best,

KK

Are you up for the test?

When I have meetings at the Kentucky Shakespeare office in downtown Louisville (Kentucky), I like to park in the open-air pay lot across the street. First of all, I don’t like parking garages and secondly, the man who runs it is friendly. It’s obvious he’s an ordinary guy, doing his best to make a living.

Recently, I pulled in and there was another gentleman in the booth. This time my meeting was the Fund for the Arts board meeting. After the meeting, I was pulling up to the booth to pay I pulled out my wallet to find that I had a large bill. Please note that I don’t make a habit of carrying large denominations. So I pulled forward and the gentleman checks my ticket and tells me it will be $4.50. And so begins my inquiry as to whether he could “break” a large bill.parking booth

He immediately said “no”. All I had on me in change was two dollars. So I implored him to let me just run to the bank and I would come back with money to pay him. He hesitated. I promised. I gave him the two dollars I had and emphatically promised to be back in 10 minutes. He relented. I went to the bank and was back in the time frame.

When I pulled in the same gentleman opened the metal booth door and smiled. “You are an honest person,” he said. I handed him a $10 dollar bill. “I didn’t believe you would come back.” With that he handed me change as if I’d given him $20. After quickly checking my bank envelope, I handed the money back explaining his error. He chuckled, “I was just testin’ ya.”

Enough tests for one day. I drove away thinking that in reality, he was probably a little challenged by the money math. I was also glad to be the honest example for the day.

Have you found yourself in situations like this? Has your character been tested?

All the best,
KK