Women


What if could hear other people’s thoughts? Do you ever wonder when you’re standing in line behind a stranger, what are they thinking? Or if you notice someone noticing you, do you wonder what opinion they are forming?

In the 2000 romantic comedy, What Women Want, ladies man, Nick, through an electrical shock is given the ability to hear women’s thoughts; to peek behind the curtain into the psyche of the female mind. After being just a little freaked out about it, it’s explained to him to be a gift. But, would it really be a gift to hear other’s thoughts?

There are many women reading this right now thinking, yes! I would love to hear my husband’s thoughts and really know what goes on inside his brain. I get that. But we don’t. How many times have you thought something and then the discernment filter comes out added to a little wisdom and you don’t express the thought? How many arguments were avoided or hurt feelings preserved? On the other hand, do we miss opportunities to encourage and support?

The ability to hear others’ thoughts would be cheating ourselves of the journey to getting to know each other. Relationships are grown over time. We slowly reveal our selves to others as trust is built and our connection grows. It a melding of souls. For those we interact with who will remain strangers or acquaintances, let me encourage you to take notice and take the opportunity to share an encouraging word or thought. You never know, it may change the direction of their thoughts.

 

KK

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leggings not pantsWell ladies (young and old) this Maxine cartoon pretty much says it all. Leggings are NOT pants, nor were they EVER intended to be. I’ve been watching this phenomenon for months. Every time I see one of these fashion emergencies I just shake my head in disappointment. My judgement isn’t limited to those with robust bums or the aged, it is cast on the young and skinny as well.

I’m no couture expert, but I do know a couple of rules about what not to wear and how to wear clothing that looks good. Your outfit should complement your shape. It’s the difference between someone saying “I really like that outfit” and someone saying “That outfit looks great on you.” You make the outfit. If you are one to wear your leggings as pants, next time you don a pair, look in the mirror. Do they really flatter your figure or just give it smooth lines?

Leggings look cute with a skirt or dress. I sometimes wear them under my workout shorts in the winter. The styles with color or designs can really add some flare to your outfit. But they absolutely do not look good by themselves as a means of covering your lower extremities. The fashion industry confused some when they added pockets and tried to call them jeggings. Let me help you out — they are NOT pants.

Would love to hear from you on this one.

KK

 

The request sounds innocent. The talk is smooth. So smooth you slide into the driver’s seat having ignored the twinge in your gut and the thought in the back of your head. It’s probably not a good idea to provide this ride. What am I doing? Before you know it you are being directed onto an abandoned road far from traffic and neighborhoods.

This is not the beginning of a bad horror movie. The situation is very real and was survived by a good friend of mine SharonPortraitwhen a former client of hers schmoozed her into her own car and then proceeded to kidnap and attack her. Today, nine years later, seven of which she spent in a legal battle, Sharon launched her movement, Own Your Moment (www.OwnYourMoment.org). Her goal is to empower, prepare, and inform others on how to protect themselves or prevent a personal attack.

Many women are given mace for their key rings when they learn to drive. In defense of a personal attack, could we get to it? Do we know how to use it fast enough before it’s taken from us? Do we trust our instincts over the risk of offending someone we don’t fully trust?

Sharon is an intelligent woman with a successful law practice. This attack took hours, but the experience has changed her life. Check her website, read her story, watch the video with her 911 call. Then tell me that you are not moved to be armed with the information and confidence to stay safe.

KK

For those of you who are learning to communicate with a teenager, this is for you. It’s mid-week on spring break when we did not take a vacation. My son is asked to do three chores one of which is to vacuum. To help with this torturous activity he wears his head phones. The following is our exchange:

He walks into my home office and says:

“Just about done, just have to do the basement steps.”

“Great, what are you listening to?”

“Of Mice and Men.”

“Cool, is it the soundtrack or the audio book?”

He looks at me in a puzzled manner not so uncommon these days and says, “no, the band, mom.”

I bust out laughing and say “I thought it was the book.”

“Oh,” he says “is that one of your classics?”20140402-142228.jpg

I love being the parent of a teen. It is a blast when our generations collide and we both learn a little something about each other. We googled the band so I could hear. Then I warned him that when his high school literature teach mentions reading Of Mice and Men not to stand up and say, “rock on!”

Still learning about parenting,
KK

 

It’s half past three in the afternoon on New Year’s Eve.  I’ve spent some time in the office taking care of a few things – organizing.  The January calendar is set up and ready for the appointments I have in the first two weeks.  The whiteboard has project priorities.  There is order to my work space.

On a personal note, the checkbook is balanced (yes, I do this at least once a month and recommend it for others).  The big home projects for the coming year have been discussed and prioritized.  To close 2013, I feel the completion of 365 full and rich days. Even those with tears and challenges brought something.

It was a good year personally and professionally.  I am so proud of my son and husband for their accomplishments and letting me be on their journey just as they have rooted me on during mine.

There were goals achieved and others still undone.  Will I recommit to the unfinished?  We will see.

I have grown personally in knowledge and wisdom.  Sometimes I feel my age and sometimes my life experience. One truth is that I will never stop learning.

As we turn the last page of the calendar, may we do so with all of the optimism a new year brings.  May we breathe in the freshness of 365 blank days and look forward to all of the activities and people who will fill them.  God bless you and carry you through each one of them.

All the best,

KK

It was December 27th.  We took down the tree, cleaned up the needles and began to put away our gifts.  With all three of us at home we took advantage of the time to move some furniture around and complete some “honey-do” items.  One thing led to another and before I knew it our upstairs hallway looked like the bedrooms had puked up every extra piece of furniture.  To pick up, sort, throw away, and put away was like eating spaghetti.Spaghetti_spiral_splayed

Opening the closet to put something away opened another opportunity to organize and create space.  The best approach I’ve found is to “one touch” stuff.  Pick something up, find it a home and put it there – don’t go down rabbit trails of new projects, just make note of them and move on.   Just keep working it and eventually you’ll find the floor (or the top of your desk – this method works well at the office).

Give it a try and let me know.

All the best,

KK

The remnants of sand and dirt felt crusty on Mary’s face from the long day’s journey and the ebb and flow of pain and sweat. The hard pain – the overwhelming stench – the crowds.  An hour from town there are tribes setting up camp everywhere.  How many more are crammed into this small town, Bethlehem?  The noise pounding in her head – the pains coming closer and closer. Oh, to just lie down.

Mary waited outside the inn for what seemed an eternity for Joseph to return.  His demeanor screamed as loud as Mary’s pain that he had failed.  There were no rooms.  The best he could provide was the privacy of the innkeeper’s barn.  A gentle touch on the shoulder from Joseph reminded Mary that he had done his best and was sorry it wasn’t better.  He wasn’t in charge of how the events of this night were unfolding.  The final steps to their accommodations were the worst on Mary’s swollen feet.

Joseph slid the barn door open only to gag from the disgusting odor.  Seems the barn was as full as the streets with visitors.  Asking one final thing of Mary, to wait in the fresher air outside while he found some straw and made bedding for her.  She submitted to her betrothed.  He didn’t sign up for this, but he certainly stepped up.

Together they slowly and gingerly walked in out of the cool night.  As he helped Mary lie down, she let out a scream from the pain.  Finally, free to let out the truth and anguish she felt.  The animals rustled and made noises like an out of tune orchestra.  Upon noticing their unexpected human guest, as if they knew who they were hosting, they laid down and became still.  As she settled in and became accustomed to the smells, sights and sounds.  She prayed.  God, we wanted better for your son.

It was a long and unfamiliar night for both Mary and Joseph; Mary too young to know much about birthing a child and Joseph too innocent.  Men didn’t get involved when a baby was coming.  But tonight was not about tradition or decorum – it was about changing the world – it was about hope and eternity colliding with all that humans thought was “normal”.  A new covenant squeezed into this night.

His birth wasn’t pretty.  Jesus joined humanity as a wiggly, slippery baby.  Mary was scared but led by what came instinctive and natural.  Joseph was awkwardly doing his best to provide blankets and a towel to wash the boy who would return the favor someday.

This night didn’t feel very holy, but it was real.  No airs or regal greeting parties for the King of Kings.  His mother felt the pains, his earthly father the helplessness, him the trauma every human baby in history feels during birth.  It was the heavenly Father who felt joy knowing He sent an invitation through Jesus. He knew he would get his son back and when He did, Jesus would bring all of the rest of His children.

The night was finally silent.  Mary could breathe without pain.  Joseph settled in next to his family. Mary-Film-The-Holy-Family For the first time since Genesis the world would be still and rest in the hope of Him who came to love, serve and save.

May every night of your coming days bring stillness, hope and peace in Jesus Christ.

Happy Birthday, Jesus.

KK

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